LEAGUE OF LEGENDS MERCH MOVIE
The NWA movie introduced a whole new generation of white suburban youth to NWA, and now we have to suffer infinite variations of the STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON stylization on everything. Thankfully, these slippers were designed to be worn indoors only. I wouldn’t wear these outside of the house under any conditions, but that’s only because I rarely ever leave my house. If Teemo was an emoji, this is the form he would take. This is the nicest product in the entire article, so go out and buy it now. And call me a nitpicker, but I don’t like that the stitching interferes with Teemo’s ear. Granted, as a late-20’s man, I’m probably not target audience for this product. Compared to the slip-ons, it also looks like a higher quality shoe featuring a canvas upper, metal eyelets, and even a toe cap! But who am I shitting? There’s no way I’d wear these shoes, at least not if I wanted to enjoy the company of another human again. It’s bright, vivid, and the details are more accurate. These shoes more tastefully incorporates the Teemo graphic by utilizing the side, rather than the top of the shoe. Why is his mouth open like that? Has anyone ever seen Teemo’s mouth so wide open before? And why does he only have one tooth? This artist’s interpretation of perspective is also a little suspect–with the eye-spot turned towards the viewer, it looks much larger than the other eye. See the paint that escaped the lines? Left Teemo looks like it was traced from an official graphic, but right Teemo looks improvised, red, and bloated. This paint-by-numbers art is inconsistent and sloppy.
I would either give this hat to a little kid as a gift, or an adult that I hate. Everyone has the right to make bad/ironic fashion decisions, but if you choose to wear this hat in public, you are choosing to be ridiculed by strangers. Much like Teemo’s passive, this Riot Official™ hat will make you invisible to females. My favorite champion to stomp in solo queue is Teemo, so I take additional satisfaction out of dismantling all Teemo-related merchandise. This is the weirdest and worst League of Legends merchandise you can find on the internet. As for Teemo merch, there is a surprising quantity of Teemo footwear out there. There’s a wide variety of bad LoL-oriented graphic tees out there, and many of them are haphazardly designed and, to be honest, socially inappropriate. I already hate most fan merch, but how do I separate the truly “bad” from just “stuff I don’t like?” After searching for every type of knick-knack and article of clothing, I discovered that half of all bad League of Legends merch is Teemo merch, and the other half is bad t-shirts.
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